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Attack of the ugly crochet from out-of-place

Those funfur legwarmers- The pompom dress- that "halloween" mask from your nightmares - This is the page for those nightmare-ish cro-ations of the past, the future and outerspace.
No copyright infringement is intended, I am just doing this for fun.


If you want, I have the how-to's stored on my computer.

Posts tagged derp

Dec 24 '11
Merry Christmas

Merry Christmas

Tags: sweater shirt ugly fail crochet annies attic derp knitting knit yarn snowman xmas diy crafting

Dec 24 '11
Zebra mittens from Annies Attic no. 54

Zebra mittens from Annies Attic no. 54

1 note Tags: ugly crochet knitting zebra gloves mittens mits fail yarn derp diy crafting

Dec 23 '11
Best Pattern for a last minute present for Dad. this pattern is trash.

Best Pattern for a last minute present for Dad.

this pattern is trash.

5 notes Tags: crochet ugly trash trash can fail derp knitting yarn dump dumb knit craft diy crafting

Nov 14 '11
Retard Pattern of the day: Finished Size: enough to satisfy your appetite Materials:Medium Weight Yarn (Beige, Red)Index finger and thumb (or equivalent fingers as necessary)Scissors1 Bowl1 Fork1 person to play a trick on Special Crochet Stitch: The Finger GrabPlace the indicated yarn between index finger and thumb.Apply ample pressure to squeeze strand of yarn, such that it does not slip from between fingers.Pull yarn the indicated distance then let go.Note: the finger grab may be tricky for some, just remember that practice makes perfect! Gauge: each finger grab should be 12” (30.5 cm) long Crochet Pattern: SpaghettiStart by placing bowl under work. By finishing off each finger grab, it should land in the bowl.Row 1 – 50: With beige, finger grab, finish off. SauceRow 1 – 10: With red, finger grab, finish off.

Retard Pattern of the day:

Finished Size: enough to satisfy your appetite

Materials:
Medium Weight Yarn (Beige, Red)
Index finger and thumb (or equivalent fingers as necessary)
Scissors
1 Bowl
1 Fork
1 person to play a trick on

Special Crochet Stitch: The Finger Grab
Place the indicated yarn between index finger and thumb.
Apply ample pressure to squeeze strand of yarn, such that it does not slip from between fingers.
Pull yarn the indicated distance then let go.
Note: the finger grab may be tricky for some, just remember that practice makes perfect!

Gauge: each finger grab should be 12” (30.5 cm) long

Crochet Pattern: Spaghetti
Start by placing bowl under work. By finishing off each finger grab, it should land in the bowl.
Row 1 – 50: With beige, finger grab, finish off.

Sauce
Row 1 – 10: With red, finger grab, finish off.

6 notes Tags: crochet yarn derp fail knitting crafting diy

Nov 12 '11
Retard pattern of the day:  Crochet Bracelet in Lion Brand® Martha Stewart CraftsTM/MC Mambo GAUGE: Exact gauge is not essential to this project. BANGLEWith 2 strands held together, chain 10.Fasten off.Knot ends. FINISHINGHide ends by tucking them under other strands with your fingers. …… Yup… 

Retard pattern of the day: 

Crochet Bracelet in Lion Brand® Martha Stewart CraftsTM/MC Mambo

GAUGE:

Exact gauge is not essential to this project.


BANGLE
With 2 strands held together, chain 10.
Fasten off.
Knot ends.

FINISHING
Hide ends by tucking them under other strands with your fingers.

…… Yup… 

16 notes Tags: crochet pattern silly derp fail knitting yarn martha stewart bracelet diy crafting

Nov 11 '11
asians….

asians….

1 note Tags: crochet funfur fail derp knitting yarn fun fur diy crafting craft

Nov 11 '11
No caption needed. 

No caption needed. 

2 notes Tags: funfur crochet knitting 90's derp fashion fail ugly yarn diy crafting

Nov 11 '11
Listen, i don’t want my toast burnt in real life — why the hook would i like to crochet burnt toast!?!?!? 

Listen, i don’t want my toast burnt in real life — why the hook would i like to crochet burnt toast!?!?!? 

6 notes Tags: crochet yarn fail toast derp diy crafting amigurumi food

Nov 11 '11
WHAT’S THE MATTER WITH YOU!? YOU LOOK LIKE YOU’VE SEEN A GHOST?!

WHAT’S THE MATTER WITH YOU!? YOU LOOK LIKE YOU’VE SEEN A GHOST?!

1 note Tags: crochet knit baby yarn fail creepy ugly d diy derp

Nov 11 '11
My all time fav. picture. All my feelings in just that one look.

My all time fav. picture. All my feelings in just that one look.

1 note Tags: toddler derp crochet knitting yarn fail ugly c crafting diy