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Attack of the ugly crochet from out-of-place

Those funfur legwarmers- The pompom dress- that "halloween" mask from your nightmares - This is the page for those nightmare-ish cro-ations of the past, the future and outerspace.
No copyright infringement is intended, I am just doing this for fun.


If you want, I have the how-to's stored on my computer.

Posts tagged crafting

Dec 24 '11
Merry Christmas

Merry Christmas

Dec 24 '11
Zebra mittens from Annies Attic no. 54

Zebra mittens from Annies Attic no. 54

Dec 23 '11
Best Pattern for a last minute present for Dad.
this pattern is trash.

Best Pattern for a last minute present for Dad.

this pattern is trash.

Nov 14 '11
Could you make this for me, in like.. blue/green funfur?

Could you make this for me, in like.. blue/green funfur?

Nov 14 '11
Retard Pattern of the day:

Finished Size: enough to satisfy your appetite
Materials:Medium Weight Yarn (Beige, Red)Index finger and thumb (or equivalent fingers as necessary)Scissors1 Bowl1 Fork1 person to play a trick on
Special Crochet Stitch: The Finger GrabPlace the indicated yarn between index finger and thumb.Apply ample pressure to squeeze strand of yarn, such that it does not slip from between fingers.Pull yarn the indicated distance then let go.Note: the finger grab may be tricky for some, just remember that practice makes perfect!
Gauge: each finger grab should be 12” (30.5 cm) long
Crochet Pattern: SpaghettiStart by placing bowl under work. By finishing off each finger grab, it should land in the bowl.Row 1 – 50: With beige, finger grab, finish off.
SauceRow 1 – 10: With red, finger grab, finish off.

Retard Pattern of the day:

Finished Size: enough to satisfy your appetite

Materials:
Medium Weight Yarn (Beige, Red)
Index finger and thumb (or equivalent fingers as necessary)
Scissors
1 Bowl
1 Fork
1 person to play a trick on

Special Crochet Stitch: The Finger Grab
Place the indicated yarn between index finger and thumb.
Apply ample pressure to squeeze strand of yarn, such that it does not slip from between fingers.
Pull yarn the indicated distance then let go.
Note: the finger grab may be tricky for some, just remember that practice makes perfect!

Gauge: each finger grab should be 12” (30.5 cm) long

Crochet Pattern: Spaghetti
Start by placing bowl under work. By finishing off each finger grab, it should land in the bowl.
Row 1 – 50: With beige, finger grab, finish off.

Sauce
Row 1 – 10: With red, finger grab, finish off.

Nov 12 '11
Free Crochet Pattern: Snowy Lane  Lame Leg Warmers
 

Free Crochet Pattern: Snowy Lane  Lame Leg Warmers

 

Nov 12 '11
Retard pattern of the day: 
Crochet Bracelet in Lion Brand® Martha Stewart CraftsTM/MC Mambo
GAUGE:
Exact gauge is not essential to this project.
BANGLEWith 2 strands held together, chain 10.Fasten off.Knot ends.
FINISHINGHide ends by tucking them under other strands with your fingers.
…… Yup… 

Retard pattern of the day: 

Crochet Bracelet in Lion Brand® Martha Stewart CraftsTM/MC Mambo

GAUGE:

Exact gauge is not essential to this project.


BANGLE
With 2 strands held together, chain 10.
Fasten off.
Knot ends.

FINISHING
Hide ends by tucking them under other strands with your fingers.

…… Yup… 

Nov 12 '11

Am i the only one seeing this??

(If not, then at least you are now. Oh, and by the way.. don’t ask me what manga, that last one is from! Please don’t!)

??

Nov 11 '11
asians….

asians….

Nov 11 '11

Naughty Hookers:

  • Am i the only one who wants to do doilies with like obvious phallic structures and filet crochet with like naughty words in them? -- Not just regular "huhuhuuh boooobs.. i did a boooob..!"
Nov 11 '11
No caption needed. 

No caption needed. 

Nov 11 '11
Listen, i don’t want my toast burnt in real life — why the hook would i like to crochet burnt toast!?!?!? 

Listen, i don’t want my toast burnt in real life — why the hook would i like to crochet burnt toast!?!?!? 

Nov 11 '11
My all time fav. picture. All my feelings in just that one look.

My all time fav. picture. All my feelings in just that one look.

Nov 11 '11
I wonder what that baby might’ve been thinking at the times, of this photo… 

I wonder what that baby might’ve been thinking at the times, of this photo… 

Nov 11 '11
I’d look like that if I saw myself like that, too. 

I’d look like that if I saw myself like that, too.